May 20th

I made it a point to eat dinner.

I was also hoping we could end the day without a fight.

This morning I had helped Amma do the cooking.  Since she had soaked some moong, I had her cook some methi in addition.

In the evening, Shilpa comes downstairs with Aditi and throws a fit about not having any kayli to use.  I show her  it in the dishwasher. How come there is so much cooking that happened? is repeated a few times.  She is willing to fight about not having a kayli but unwilling to pull one out of the dishwasher and clean it. Why should I clean it?  she says.  She is aggravated about not having a kayli and after a lot of fuss pulls out two little kayli to cook in instead.

Then throws another fit how the cooker is on the counter and other vessels left of drying.  When she finds something irritating, it is okay to express it. But reverse the situation and expressing something like that would amount to picking a fight. We have talked several times about putting away the mixer and its parts but it never happen unless someone is visiting. She leaves behind things on the counter every day. This is an old habit. She does not notice any of that because she is at work. Folks using the kitchen  (her Amma when she was here or now my Amma, ) end up clearing  it because they have no other choice.

Come upstairs after 20-30 mins (that’s how it look to cook) and demands to know if I applied oil to Aditi. This is May and I am supposed to know that Aditi’s skin is dry. She claims to be applying oil everyday and that I was remiss in not doing it.

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